After Many Years of Marriage, Is Valentine's Just Another Day?

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
Des Moines, Iowa, United States of America (Free-Press-Release.com) February 14, 2012 -- "When you've been married as long as we have, Valentine's Day is nothing special." Does this statement reflect your attitude towards Cupid's favorite day?" asks Roy Richards, author, coach and speaker on middle age renewal. "In your established midlife marriage, is the bloom off the rose, romance gone for good, you and your spouse simply best of friends? In contrast, like fine wine, has your marital bond become more precious with each passing year?"

Roy recognizes that most middle-aged couples have had more than a few distractions over the years: career, children, paying the mortgage, simply existing in today's complex society. Furthermore, most individuals in their forties, fifties and sixties are not as fit, energetic or downright good looking as they were in their twenties and thirties. In light of this, should anyone at or past middle age simply give up on romance?

"By no means!" emphaticly states Richards. He cites his local newspaper, which on Valentine's Day published a pictures of a couple married for 78 years but hugging each other like newlyweds, and of an energetic 82-year-old retired executive (who looks 62) along with a very happy third wife (the first two died of natural causes) lovingly posing for pictures as they describe the joys of a daily life full of challenge and adventure.

Before writing off Valentine's as "just another day", Richards offer four "love tactics" a love-starved husband or wife might employ:

1. At least for this one day, make your spouse the undivided center of your attention. Begin the day with absolutely no agenda other than to satisfy your spouse's every desire. Ask him or her, "Honey, please tell me precisely how you would like to spend the day? What can I do to make your day ideal?" Note: if like 2012, Valentine's falls on a workday, you might wish to postpone your spouse's special day to the weekend so job responsibilities won't interfere.

2. Imagine the ideal life partner for your spouse. How well do you fit the description? If far from ideal, how much are you willing to change? Can you service your spouse's needs and desires without abandoning your own core values and most cherished ambitions? Let's assume that your spouse also wants to see you happy and fulfilled. Can the two of you meet in the middle and both find joy? A genuine and ongoing investment in the dreams and aspirations of the person closest to you is a surefire formula for restoring romance.

3. Set aside at least one night each week and one weekend each month just for the two of you. When no one tells you what to do, how do you as a couple most like to spend your time? Richards contends that no matter how long married, every couple needs at least some time alone. "If you have young children, arrange a sitter. If you don't wish to go out, cuddle up by the fire, unwind together, kiss and hug then perhaps...(you know what)!"

4. If one or both of you are less than fully satisfied with fitness, appearance or energy, why not launch a diet and exercise regimen together? Take extra time out each day for personal grooming. Launch a contest over who can lose the most weight. Not only will pounds melt away, both of you will gain energy and enthusiasm. Each of you will once again begin to notice how special your life partner looks and how happy he or she feels. Richards offers a wager: "I'll bet that next Valentine's Day you two will experience a far greater interest in good old-fashioned romance."

Richards concludes, "Like so many other good things in life, romance, a spirit of adventure and positive expectations for the future are not restricted to the young. You need not abandon notions of romantic evenings with your spouse simply because you are over forty, fifty or beyond and have been married to the same person for a long time. Many years ago, you staked your future happiness upon the same life partner you remain with today. Back then, your cherished nothing more than sharing emotions and spending long hours with your true love, why not now? Resolve today to invite your spouse to join you on a second half life journey that will make every day seem like Valentine's.

Roy's acclaimed book, A Mid-Life Challenge WAKE UP! offers a comprehensive roadmap to restoring positive mid-life relationships and emotions. To preview his two books and to receive free gifts , simply visit his website: www.MiddleAgeRenewal.com

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