International Men's Day: Accentuating The Positive

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
(Free-Press-Release.com) November 19, 2011 --

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International Men's Day: Accentuating The Positive

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According to event sources International Men's Day 2011 has witnessed a massive surge of interest in more than 60 countries. Enjoying observation in a mere 5 countries just four years ago, this increase is a remarkable achievement considering the event receives no government nor private funding for it's national and global promotions. International Women's Day, by way of contrast, enjoys strong institutional backing receiving literally billions in financial sponsorship from public and private grants- all of which ensures the funding of venues, speakers, entertainment, gifts and the all-important attraction of everyday men and women to events. Regarding IIMD It is not men alone chanting it's praises- women now constitute at least half of all enthusiasts of the event according to data from Facebook and the official IMD website, and almost half of the global coordinators of the event are women. The big question is why the sudden interest?

Something has clearly happened in the last five years that has encouraged events like 'Movember' (a moustache growing charity for male cancers), and International Men's Day into the limelight. Might it be -as some have suggested- we have become tired of our usual sport of stereotyping males as chauvinists, one and all? Are we belatedly allowing ourselves to see males as not-so-powerful human beings who are vulnerable to things like cancer, homelessness, mental illness, suicide, unemployment, marginalization, accidents and all the other vulnerabilities that come with being human? This is certainly the view of many persons involved in International Men's Day. In their view IMD gives voice to the voiceless millions of males who are not among the 1% of their sex occupying the top political posts or enjoying the financial and power rewards belonging to CEOs.

The question of men’s place in society, and an acknowledgment of their health and vulnerabilities has never been more important than now. Over recent decades there has appeared a veritable avalanche of moral injunctions calling for the “reconstruction of maleness,” especially for the reconstruction of men’s attitude toward male-female relationships, to family and to society. The effort to “improve” males has so far consisted, at least predominately, in a highlighting of numerous male flaws in need of correction; proneness to violence, a need to dominate, a lack of father-involvement in families and so on. By pointing out these and other flaws those who wished to reconstruct males have hoped to prick men’s consciences by the use of negative profiling, and to gently shame them into reaching for higher moral standards. As we approach 30 years of this reconstructive technique (for want of a better term) we might now pause to ask how effective it has been. Are males more positively behaved toward family and spousal relationships? Are they better behaved in society? Are they more eager to contribute and participate to the betterment of society? And importantly, has the shaming approach had some unintended and perhaps negative side effects? Those celebrating International Men's Day appear to be saying yes to the latter, and according to them the side effects have reached a fulcrum.

There is no doubt that males today are more conscious than generations past of the need to respect women, commit to family responsibilities, to support equality in the workplace, and to combat all forms violence, particularly violence against women. They are also more likely to be involved in domestic work such as cooking and cleaning than men of a generation ago, and in each of these areas we can confirm some success for the reconstructive effort. However the down side of this push for reconstruction is less openly acknowledged. Now, more than any time in the past men and boys throughout our global village appear reluctant to engage in the kinds of altruistic social and political activities they once did. In fact growing numbers appear reluctant to engage in society whatsoever, with a significant percentage of younger males preferring to drop out and live on the fringes of society as drug addicts, loners, absent fathers and “deadbeats”. Boys of school age appearing less likely to care about their academic performance, and their marks have slidden. Dropout rates are extremely high. Males are now less likely to offer their services in schools, to Churches and charities, or to seek careers in ‘caring’ occupations such as the childcare or the disability sector. Males have been in involved in many forms of subtle but measurable retreat.

In considering the destructive impacts of negative stereotyping an immediate solution to the problem suggests itself- the reinstitution of a positive male discourse and positive reinforcement of quality behaviours. In the past –and as recently as 30 – 40 years ago- it was commonplace to laud men’s acts of selflessness, stoicism and kindness; “Paul always has time for his children, he is a wonderful father”, “Peter is doing so well in his school exams, I can’t praise him enough”, (etc). Whilst that kind of praise is still seen, it has been radically curtailed and superseded by a newer practice of shaming, the philosophy of which states that males are better motivated by shaming than by positive encouragement and reinforcement of quality behaviours. Put simply, this philosophy says: tell young males what they must not do in order to avoid being 'bad'.... but do not bother to reinforce any positive behaviours. This pointing out of flaws effectively teaches young males to become experts in learning what they must not do so as to avoid long-winded lectures, condemnation or punishment, but they do not end up learning much about what they can do and what they can be, as they have experienced mainly negative societal injunctions. Such children may feel that interactions with parent and world are dehumanizing, causing them to labour with each interaction. This ‘what you shouldn’t do’ discourse turns boys into experts in what they must not do, but they have little concept about what they can do and so flounder with the creation of a positive identity, positive ambition, and with self-esteem. The negative injunctions have removed from their repertoire the power to dream positively about themselves or their futures.

A more disturbing possibility afforded by stereotyping is suggested by Scottish psychiatrist R.D. Laing who writes, "The attributes one ascribes to a person define him and put him in a particular position. By assigning him to a particular position, attributions ‘put him in his place’ and thus have the force of injunctions. Attributions made by Peter about Paul may be conjunctive or disjunctive with attributes made by Paul about Paul.” Laing here draws our attention to the fact that negative attributes we ascribe to an individual may be disjunctive with his true identity, but in making the attribution we nevertheless pressure the individual to identify with the profile. For example, "You must pledge to never bash girls" may force a nonviolent boy to accept, on some level, that his nature and inclinations are violent thus the attribute acts as an injunction. On some level boys who are pressured to identify with negative male stereotypes tend to form a distorted belief that contributions from we inherently uncivilized males are unwelcome in a civil society- dropout becomes the only viable moral option.

The solution to this pattern is to accentuate the positive, to re introduce to the male repertoire an ability to dream about themselves, to know what they can do to enjoy valorization and self-worth in this world. International Men's Day has struck precisely this chord with its proscription that males respond more energetically to positive role models than to negative stereotyping of their gender.

By devoting a day and a new approach to the physical, psychological, and social welfare of our men and boys International Men’s Day hopes to change the status quo. As more people get behind this alternative discourse we should see an increase in quality male participation and the reemergence of a more caring humanity.

More information can be found online at http://www.international-mens-day.com/

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