Residents encouraged to procreate every Wednesday to boost city’s sagging birthrate
August 27, 2003 (Press Release) --
HALLANDALE, FLORIDA - Fearing his city’s dwindling population and low birthrate are costing the city political clout and curtailing its tax revenue base, Hallandale businessman, Alan Wasser, is organizing a city-wide ‘H.U.M.P. Day’ (Hallandale Unified for More People) on Wednesday, September 3rd on which Hallandale residents are encouraged to procreate. If successful, Wasser hopes to make HUMP Day into a national holiday to help bolster the sagging U.S. birthrate.
“This is no joke,” said the civic-minded Wasser, owner of Wasser’s Exclusive Furniture and Interiors in Hallandale’s Fashion Row district. “Hallandale’s population is declining precipitously and we need to re-populate fast or we’ll lose major census dollars. We’re encouraging citywide copulation on September 3rd.”
Wasser says he’s not promoting immoral behavior. He says rather than random, indiscriminant mating, only married couples of child-bearing age should participate in H.U.M.P. Day.
“This is a serious effort to remedy a serious problem,” said Wasser. “The revenues lost because of a dwindling population mean less money for public services such as fire rescue, schools and much more. This is nothing less than a quality of life issue.”
Wasser is also trying to enlist the help of his fellow merchants to help set the mood for HUMP Day. He’s calling on local restaurants, lounges and lingerie shops to offer special, ‘get-in-the-mood’ deals on HUMP Day. Romantic dinners and sexy attire are just some of the things Wasser hopes local merchants will supply at steeply discounted prices.
“We’ve all got to pitch in,” Wasser said. “Unfortunately, in our day and age this is what is takes to get people to act.”
For more information on H.U.M.P. Day, call Alan Wasser at 954-454-9500, or on his cell phone at 305-318-1282.
“This is no joke,” said the civic-minded Wasser, owner of Wasser’s Exclusive Furniture and Interiors in Hallandale’s Fashion Row district. “Hallandale’s population is declining precipitously and we need to re-populate fast or we’ll lose major census dollars. We’re encouraging citywide copulation on September 3rd.”
Wasser says he’s not promoting immoral behavior. He says rather than random, indiscriminant mating, only married couples of child-bearing age should participate in H.U.M.P. Day.
“This is a serious effort to remedy a serious problem,” said Wasser. “The revenues lost because of a dwindling population mean less money for public services such as fire rescue, schools and much more. This is nothing less than a quality of life issue.”
Wasser is also trying to enlist the help of his fellow merchants to help set the mood for HUMP Day. He’s calling on local restaurants, lounges and lingerie shops to offer special, ‘get-in-the-mood’ deals on HUMP Day. Romantic dinners and sexy attire are just some of the things Wasser hopes local merchants will supply at steeply discounted prices.
“We’ve all got to pitch in,” Wasser said. “Unfortunately, in our day and age this is what is takes to get people to act.”
For more information on H.U.M.P. Day, call Alan Wasser at 954-454-9500, or on his cell phone at 305-318-1282.
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