Well, the good news is the most painful part of surviving a break up is the beginning. So, you can take a little comfort in the fact, that...
United States of America (Press Release) May 21, 2008 --
Well, the good news is the most painful part of surviving a break up is the beginning. So, you can take a little comfort in the fact, that what you are going through right now, or what you just went through--is the worst of it! I know it's hard to take comfort in anything right now, given your situation.., but that is exactly the kind of thing that can help you get through a difficult day, while on the road to surviving a break up.
As with everything we don't want to happen to us.., and surviving a break up is no different, our first and completely natural instinct is to push it away. Bury it, push it way down. It's that sense of loss we don't want to feel. Nobody wants to feel that. It sucks. It's that empty feeling in the pit of your stomach. You know what I'm talking about. So, don't get to down on yourself, if you seem to be doing just that, at the moment. We all do and not just when we are surviving a breakup... When anything happens that we don't want to, we push it away! Give yourself a break at the beginning of this process. After all you just got dumped! Seriously though, it's no fun being on either side of a breakup, as I'm sure you all know.
Remember, while it is okay and quite common to push away all these unwanted feelings, while surviving a breakup.., we cannot get stuck there. Feel them, experience them, sit with them. Let them pass! It's a lot like meditating... People seem to think meditation is this beautiful, peaceful experience. It can be, but on the way to that beautiful-peaceful place, you are bombarded with thoughts of your everyday life flying in and out of your mind. If all you did was try and ignore those thoughts, you really wouldn't get much out of meditating. Never mind that beautiful, peaceful feeling. But if you acknowledge those everyday thoughts and than let them pass, you can slowly move towards that beautiful, peaceful experience. Just like you will be rewarded for having gone through those horrible first stages of surviving a breakup. The deeper you go, the greater the reward--the understanding, the healing. Don't be afraid to go there... And seeking out material to reference is not only suggested but recommended. Don't be embarrassed to go through this process. If you are, you will not only have an extremely difficult time surviving your breakup.., but you will cheat yourself out of an amazing learning experience. Once you feel better, it will be really difficult to remember how miserable you felt.
As with everything we don't want to happen to us.., and surviving a break up is no different, our first and completely natural instinct is to push it away. Bury it, push it way down. It's that sense of loss we don't want to feel. Nobody wants to feel that. It sucks. It's that empty feeling in the pit of your stomach. You know what I'm talking about. So, don't get to down on yourself, if you seem to be doing just that, at the moment. We all do and not just when we are surviving a breakup... When anything happens that we don't want to, we push it away! Give yourself a break at the beginning of this process. After all you just got dumped! Seriously though, it's no fun being on either side of a breakup, as I'm sure you all know.
Remember, while it is okay and quite common to push away all these unwanted feelings, while surviving a breakup.., we cannot get stuck there. Feel them, experience them, sit with them. Let them pass! It's a lot like meditating... People seem to think meditation is this beautiful, peaceful experience. It can be, but on the way to that beautiful-peaceful place, you are bombarded with thoughts of your everyday life flying in and out of your mind. If all you did was try and ignore those thoughts, you really wouldn't get much out of meditating. Never mind that beautiful, peaceful feeling. But if you acknowledge those everyday thoughts and than let them pass, you can slowly move towards that beautiful, peaceful experience. Just like you will be rewarded for having gone through those horrible first stages of surviving a breakup. The deeper you go, the greater the reward--the understanding, the healing. Don't be afraid to go there... And seeking out material to reference is not only suggested but recommended. Don't be embarrassed to go through this process. If you are, you will not only have an extremely difficult time surviving your breakup.., but you will cheat yourself out of an amazing learning experience. Once you feel better, it will be really difficult to remember how miserable you felt.
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